time to break suction.

Well, I woke up this morning and read my Bible before doing anything else. I haven't been doing that lately. I typically wake up and then see everything that needs done: laundry, dishes, and other cleaning..so I start stressing and start cleaning and before I know it, it's time for bed.

So after reading my Bible, I headed to my parent's house to get some laundry done (see previous post-we can't use our washer/dryer yet so are washing clothes there and hanging them outside on clothesline to dry) It's around 11:30am when I get to my parent's house and both of my brother's are still asleep. My parent's are going through A LOT right now..they live in a small 2 bedroom trailer and my 26 and 21 year old brothers both moved in with them. My parents have one bedroom, my oldest brother has the 2nd bedroom and my younger brother sleeps on the couch. In the living room, is a crib that my youngest brother's twins share.

My 26-year-old brother has a 4-year-old daughter who is with her mom during the week and with my brother on the weekends..he also has a 6-month-old son who lives with the mom but spends the night at my parents often. My 21-year-old brother has boy/girl twins who are 16 months old and live with their mom half the week, with my brother the other half. Both of my brothers are still married but separated from their wives. My oldest brother says he wants a divorce but can't afford it; he is seeing someone now and has a baby with her. My youngest brother says he doesn't want a divorce, but is seeing someone else right now. So my parent's house is PACKED 24/7 with people. It's frustrating at times because my kids are always put last. My kids haven't been able to spend the night at my parent's house in a year & a half (that's how long my brothers have lived with my parents) I don't really care for my kids to go down to my parent's to even visit because there is no room for them there, plus with so many people living together, someone is always sick there.

And I have mixed emotions regarding my parents on this. I feel bad that they are going through this, but then don't feel bad because they are allowing it. Don't get me wrong-I love them so much, but they are not helping the situation. Growing up, my mom did EVERYTHING for us (my dad & us kids). Seriously. For example, I remember being 12 years old, lying on the couch downstairs, and yelling upstairs for my mom to get me something to drink..and she would come downstairs and do it. My dad would come home from work, go upstairs to his computer for the rest of the night, and my mom would bring his dinner upstairs to him and take his dirty dishes downstairs when he was done. My dad didn't talk to us much and if we got in trouble (discipline was very rare) it was from my mom. My brothers and I never had any chores..and as you can imagine, it was a shock when I became pregnant with my daughter at 18, got married and moved out on my own. I had never done laundry, washed dishes, cleaned house..NOTHING. The sad part was that, growing up, my mom tried to keep up with everything on her own, but just couldn't do it. And I think that just seeing how unorganized and messy everything was made me NOT want that for my house. And unfortunately, I can be almost OCD (obsessive-compulsive) about cleaning because I don't want things to be like they were growing up. I can be "a pain in the butt" about my kids keeping their things picked up etc. which can cause a lot of arguments and stress on all ends.

But the way my mom was growing up, is how she still is now. And so my brothers, who are adults, are living at home and my mom is doing everything for them again. They sleep in until 2 or 3 in the afternoon, do no chores, and make a huge mess of the whole house. While my parent's are both working, trying to make ends meet and supporting all of those people. And I have tried talking to my mom about the situation. I told her that they will never learn how to do things on their own. I told her that my brothers will be 40 years old still living at home with them. I tried explaining that she is not helping them, she is actually hurting them. She says that she doesn't want them out on the streets with nowhere to go. Last month, she did get angry and told them they both needed to be out by June 1st..but the deadline came and went with nothing happening. My brothers know that she's not serious and continue to mooch off of them. I don't see how anyone could be okay with living off of someone else like that. At the least, I would be doing all of the housework and having everything spotless, since my parents are paying for everything. If my brothers' kids need diapers, formula, wet wipes etc my mom goes to the store and buys it. And that's a tough situation because she doesn't want the kids going without necessities but my brothers are making no effort on their part.

I'm just not sure what else to do. My parent's have to get to the point where they are seriously fed up and kick them both out. And I hope that it happens soon..